The one thing that I appreciate most in life is the fact that I have been blessed with a child.
Well, I probably shouldn't refer to her as a 'child' anymore, she is a young adult. She is an intelligent, beautiful, talented 23 year old woman. And honestly, at every single stage in her life up to this point, she has been more accomplished than I have been or ever could be, simply because I do not have her abilities or intellect. And no, I am not just saying this as a proud or biased parent. I am just stating clean, unadulterated facts.
This young lady has survived despite the fact that her dad and I messed her up mentally. It was unintentional but undeniable. I will leave the details of this for a subsequent post but in summary - excessive pressure in school, not encouraging her to have a life outside of her studies, me focussing on my work and not raising her, our separation, our divorce, her father having either a personality or a mental disorder, and being the one to raise her primarily because her mom was MIA, and the list goes on.....
Sometimes I like to sit and reminisce about how happy, talkative, and friendly she was as a child....but this was before she transitioned into a withdrawn teenager who was subsequetly diagnosed with clinical depression. Even though her mental health challenges have continued into adulthood, she tries to be okay. Tries being the operative word
What is the point of my story?
It is simple:
Raising a kid well is not as easy or straightforward as it may seem. Do NOT have a child if you are not financially or mentally prepared. Do NOT have a child if your living environment and support system is not conducive or suitable.
Take it from me, children are not as tenacious as you may think. Of course, everyone is different but young minds can be quite delicate and fragile. And trust me - you do not want to be the one responsible (whether partially or fully) for damaging your own offspring. They do not need that, this world is heartless enough on it's own.
Comments